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When I initially became a mommy, I knew that I wanted to do things differently than how I was raised. My mother and father did the best job they could, however they really did not have access to the huge selection of positive parenting tools available today. Discipline Techniques For 2 Year Olds
There were a couple of books on our shelf concerning managing power struggles, exactly how to deal with the strong-willed child, and also just how to get your kids to obey. I recall seeing these books around the house, and I clearly remember thinking at the time, “My parents do not understand me.”
I’m not sure exactly what they discovered in those books, but I experienced a great deal of spanking, a great deal of screaming, as well as a great deal of just plain tempers raging.
It was a difficult period of time. And our connection is still strained today, although I have genuinely forgiven them for their mistakes. I’ve begun to understand that, while nobody is perfect, it is our responsibility to be the most effective parent we can possibly be for our children. I recognized I wanted to break the cycle when I came to be a mama.Discipline Techniques For 2 Year Olds
From toddlers to teenagers, positive parenting is my answer Discipline Techniques For 2 Year Olds
My own experience with positive parenting started when my oldest child was born. I started checking out articles concerning how a child’s secure attachment to a parent is harmed with spanking, screaming, extreme punishments as well as pretty much every other typically accepted parenting method.
I started to think, “Well, if you can’t do those things, how in the world do you get obtain your kids to listen to you?” Little did I know there’s an entire tool kit of positive parenting tips that enable everyone to have their needs satisfied. I found out about:
• Resolving power struggles
• Solid communication skills
• Natural consequences
• Just how all of these concepts cause healthy and balanced child development Discipline Techniques For 2 Year Olds
During my learning experience, my other half Antonio joined my journey. He brought a different viewpoint. He had 2 teen boys from a previous marriage, and also had actually witnessed firsthand exactly how being the “mean father” may seem to work for the moment. However in the long run, it was just breeding disrespect, anger as well as bitterness in what was intended to be a caring parent-child relationship.
Given his background and also finding out exactly what NOT to do, Antonio was just as open as I was to researching and also following through with positive parenting in our lives.
What does positive parenting mean anyway? Discipline Techniques For 2 Year Olds
Let me tell you what it does not imply. Positive parenting is NOT:
• Allowing your kids to do whatever they want
• Being a lazy parent
• Overlooking major misbehavior
• Offering your children whatever they want Discipline Techniques For 2 Year Olds
• Being a servant on-call 24/7
• Safeguarding your kids from what will be expected of them in “the real world”
• Having no restrictions
You might hear positive parenting called by other names like peaceful parenting, gentle parenting, respectful parenting or connection parenting. No matter what you call it, this parenting approach identifies the reality that cooperation consistently produces better long-term outcomes than forced control.
Moms and dads that embrace this design have actually learned to cultivate:
• Shared respect
• Empathy (both in themselves and in their children)
• Establishing healthy and balanced boundaries
• Building a child’s fundamental character and morals
• Assisting children to do what’s right because they WANT to, not because they fear retribution if they do not … Besides, what occurs once they’re adults and also the threat of punishment is removed?
• Recommendation that both children and also parents need to be listened to and valued
• Helping kids to establish self-control
• Going deeper than mere external conformity and focusing on the child’s heart
The funny thing is, when you actually dig in to the heart issues, all the surface-level “obedience” stuff takes care of itself.
What are some positive parenting techniques? And how do you correct a child’s bad behavior with positive parenting?
When I initially began down the road of gentle parenting, I could not envision that there were various other ways to “get a child to behave” besides harsh punishments and yelling. That’s just how I was raised, and therefore I simply had no understanding about anything different. Discipline Techniques For 2 Year Olds
I’ll share some parenting strategies I learned from Amy McCready, a nationally recognized parenting expert as well as founder of Positive Parenting Solutions. Amy has actually functioned as parenting guide to countless moms and dads, helping them eliminate the power struggle of reactionary parenting with her 7-Step Parenting Success System online course.
Identify the root of the behavior
I told you this is deep stuff. It’s usually much easier (and also extra common in today’s world) to think children are simply spoiled-rotten brats, which is why they act out.
We can get a lot further towards fixing power struggles when we see children as little human beings. They have needs similar to you as well as me. And many times their legitimate needs are amplified based on where they’re currently at on the brain as well as language development growth spectrum. Discipline Techniques For 2 Year Olds
For instance, a 2-year-old’s pre-frontal cortex (the part of the brain that makes it possible for self-discipline) is not yet formed. That suggests they can go from cloud nine one minute to major meltdown the next. So as opposed to dealing with a losing fight by sending a 2-year-old to time-out for slapping you on the arm, you can acknowledge that:
• Young children have little self-discipline to start with
• Anger is a secondary feeling – that suggests there is typically a key feeling below it
• Most upset children are really anxious and/or very sad
So what’s a peaceful parent to do?
• Determine if there are any type of fundamental needs that have to be addressed first. As an example, if a child is starving or tired, there’s no measure of peaceful OR punitive parenting that is likely to assist. Focus on meeting that large need first.
• Validate his emotions without accepting the misbehavior (“I can see that you’re truly mad due to the fact that I said we couldn’t go to the park today. I recognize it’s tough because you really really want to play on the swings. Hitting hurts, and I won’t allow you to do it”) … Then, move away to protect yourself if necessary.
• Concentrating way too much on what you DON’T desire the child to do only makes the circumstance even worse. So redirect the behavior toward something he is OK to do to let off steam when he is furious – like surround himself in a large hug and say “I am angry!” Or tighten his hands right into fists and also growl. The goal is to permit him to express his disappointment in an age-appropriate way, while not hurting anybody or anything.
Keep In Mind the Golden Rule
I informed you previously that positive parenting helps all ages – from young children to ‘tweens, teens and also everyone in between. So let’s talk about teenagers in our next scenario … Discipline Techniques For 2 Year Olds
Respectful parenting goes both ways. That suggests what we desire to obtain from our child, we need to be prepared to provide. If I am impolite, controlling and also sarcastic to my young adult simply because I “have every right since I am the parent” or since “my kid started it,” what do you think that reveals to my child?
It is much easier to provide respect to a person when they are respecting and appreciating you. As the mommy or dad, you can set the standard as well as communicate to your young adult that you value their viewpoint, and you appreciate them as an individual. Discipline Techniques For 2 Year Olds
This does not indicate you need to be a pushover. It does indicate you can be kind in the face of conflict. It will certainly accomplish more than you realize to set the stage for problem solving together towards a resolution.
In a similar way, children mature a million times more from what we do than from what we claim to believe. So, if we want our young adult to treat us with even more respect, the very first step is to make sure that you, as the parent, are doing simply that to everyone in your life. Discipline Techniques For 2 Year Olds
Are you kind to your spouse, to your brother or sisters, to all your children, and also to the customer service associate on the phone? In each of those circumstances, you have a VIP audience of one (your child!) that you must be considering. Keep in mind, the apple will not fall far from the tree.
Is positive parenting really effective?
I could answer this one with a resounding “Yes!” Or I could share an individual recollection …
Just the other day, my 2 young girls were having a tiff. I asked my 3-year-old how she really felt, and also she said she was angry due to the fact that my 6-year-old took a sticker label she was having fun with.
My 6-year-old heard this, escaped to the other room to collect her thoughts, then returned and returned the swiped sticker label, said sorry as well as asked for forgiveness.
They made up, hugged and started playing once more happily. Yes, this ACTUALLY HAPPENED. No, I did not control or threaten anyone to settle the conflict. And also yet we experienced a peaceful resolution. You know why? Discipline Techniques For 2 Year Olds
Due to the fact that we have modeled for our children how to problem solve, exactly how to solve conflict, and even just how to say sorry. That’s right – we say sorry to our kids when we make a mistake. (Gasp! Ask forgiveness to children, oh the horror.) That investment is returned a thousand-fold when you understand your children will undoubtedly repeat your actions.
The bottom line is … When we can swallow our pride, treat everybody around us with respect, and also model the actions we desire, you would certainly be astonished at what’s feasible.
Some readers may be curious about my partner, Antonio, and his 2 adolescent boys from a previous marriage. Over time, Antonio has begun parenting positively also, and the repair of their connection is nothing short of a miracle.
Exactly how can you come to be a positive parent? Discipline Techniques For 2 Year Olds
This is the million-dollar question! Knowing positive parenting is one of the most fulfilling things I have actually ever done. I will not lie to you – it can be difficult to alter your old way of life. Yet little by little, you will certainly make improvements. And also a year or two from now, you will not believe how much you’ve altered, together with the closer partnership you have with your kids.
I recommend anybody who is serious about growing to be an extra positive mommy or father to check out Amy McCready’s Positive Parenting Solutions FREE parenting class. Discipline Techniques For 2 Year Olds
You’ve most likely seen Amy on ABC, CBS, CNN, FOX, MSNBC, Today Show, Rachel Ray or any kind of variety of media networks. Her materials have actually been life-altering for greater than 75,000 moms and dads around the world, and there’s no better parenting guidance you can really apply every day.
In her complimentary class, Amy shares just how to get kids of every age to listen WITHOUT manipulating or screaming. She’ll assist you in starting parenting positive, as well as discover how to stop the power struggle before it starts! You can sign up for the cost-free class by clicking the button below. Discipline Techniques For 2 Year Olds
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