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When I first came to be a mama, I understood that I intended to do things differently than how I was raised. My mom and dad did the best they could, but they really did not have accessibility to the wide variety of positive parenting tools available today. How Do I Discipline My 2 Year Old For Daycare
There were a couple of books on our bookshelf regarding handling power struggles, exactly how to deal with the stubborn child, and also how to get your kids to comply. I remember seeing these books around our home, and I distinctly recall thinking at the time, “My mom and dad don’t understand me.”
I’m unsure just what they discovered in those books, however I grew up with a lot of spanking, a great deal of shouting, and a lot of just plain blowing up.
It was a challenging period of time. And also our connection is still not the best today, although I’ve truly forgiven them for their misjudgements. I’ve begun to realize that, while no one is without fault, it is our obligation to be the very best parent we can possibly be for our children. I recognized I wanted to break the cycle when I came to be a mommy.How Do I Discipline My 2 Year Old For Daycare
From toddlers to teenagers, positive parenting is my plan How Do I Discipline My 2 Year Old For Daycare
My own experience with positive parenting started when my oldest daughter was born. I began reading blog posts about just how a child’s secure attachment to a parent is harmed by spanking, screaming, severe punishments and practically every other generally approved parenting strategy.
I started to assume, “Well, if you can’t do those things, just how in the world do you get obtain your kids to listen to you?” Little did I realize there’s an entire tool kit of positive parenting tips that allow every person to get their needs satisfied. I learned more about:
• Solving power struggles
• Solid communication skills
• Natural consequences
• Just how all of these concepts lead to healthy child development How Do I Discipline My 2 Year Old For Daycare
During my learning experience, my husband Antonio joined my journey. He brought a different point of view. He had two teen boys from a previous relationship, and also had actually experienced firsthand exactly how being the “mean dad” may appear to help for the moment. Yet long-term, it was just promoting disrespect, anger and also resentment in what was supposed to be a loving parent-child relationship.
Considering his history as well as discovering specifically what NOT to do, Antonio was just as open as I was to researching and following through with positive parenting in our lives.
So what does positive parenting mean anyway? How Do I Discipline My 2 Year Old For Daycare
First, let me inform you what it does not imply. Positive parenting is NOT:
• Allowing your kids to do whatever they want
• Being a passive parent
• Ignoring major misbehavior
• Providing your children every little thing they want How Do I Discipline My 2 Year Old For Daycare
• Being a servant on-call 24/7
• Shielding your kids from what will certainly be required of them in “real life”
• Having no boundaries
You may hear positive parenting called by other names like peaceful parenting, gentle parenting, respectful parenting or connection parenting. Regardless of what you call it, this parenting technique recognizes the fact that cooperation always generates far better lasting results than strict control.
Moms and dads that embrace this concept have actually learned to promote:
• Mutual respect
• Empathy (both in themselves and also in their children)
• Setting healthy limits
• Building a child’s foundational character traits
• Assisting children to do what’s right because they WANT to, not because they are afraid of punishment if they don’t … After all, what occurs once they’re grownups and also the threat of punishment is over?
• Recommendation that both children and also parents need to be listened to and valued
• Assisting kids to grow their self-restraint
• Going much deeper than plain outside compliance and also concentrating on the child’s heart
The amusing thing is, when you really dig in to the heart issues, all the surface-level “obedience” stuff resolves itself.
What are some positive parenting techniques? And how do you correct a child’s bad behavior with positive parenting?
When I first started on the journey of gentle parenting, I couldn’t envision that there were other techniques to “get a child to behave” besides punishing as well as yelling. That’s exactly how I was raised, and therefore I just had no understanding about anything different. How Do I Discipline My 2 Year Old For Daycare
I’ll share some parenting strategies I learned from Amy McCready, a well-respected parenting expert as well as owner of Positive Parenting Solutions. Amy has actually functioned as parenting guide to thousands of mothers and fathers, helping them get rid of the power struggle of reactionary parenting with her 7-Step Parenting Success System on-line program.
Discover the root of the misbehavior
I told you this is deep. It’s often much easier (as well as more typical in today’s world) to presume children are simply spoiled brats, and that is why they act out.
We can progress a whole lot more towards fixing power struggles when we see children as little human beings. They have needs similar to you as well as me. And most times their legitimate needs are amplified based on where they’re at on the brain and also language development spectrum. How Do I Discipline My 2 Year Old For Daycare
A 2-year-old’s pre-frontal cortex (the component of the brain that makes it possible for self-control) is not yet formed. That indicates they can go from delighted one moment to major meltdown the next. So rather than fighting a losing battle by sending a 2-year-old to time-out for hitting you on the arm, you can acknowledge that:
• Young children have little self-discipline to begin with
• Anger is a secondary feeling – that suggests there is typically a primary feeling under it
• A lot of upset children are in fact scared and/or very sad
So what’s a peaceful parent to do?
• Determine if there are any type of fundamental needs that must be met first. For example, if a child is starving or sleepy, there’s no amount of peaceful OR punitive parenting that is likely to help. Concentrate on addressing that huge need initially.
• Acknowledge his feelings without accepting the actions (“I can see that you’re sincerely angry due to the fact that I said we could not go to the park today. I understand it’s difficult since you really wish to play on the swings. Hitting hurts, and also I will not let you do it”) … Then, move away to shield yourself if required.
• Focusing too much on what you DON’T want the child to do only makes the scenario even worse. So redirect the behavior towards something he MAY DO to let off steam when he is furious – like surround himself in a large hug and also say loudly “I’m mad!” Or tighten his hands right into fists and growl. The point is to permit him to express his anger in an age-appropriate way, while not hurting any person or anything.
Remember the Golden Rule
I informed you earlier that positive parenting helps every age – from toddlers to ‘tweens, teens as well as everything in between. So let’s think about teens in our next scenario … How Do I Discipline My 2 Year Old For Daycare
Respectful parenting goes both ways. That means what we intend to receive from our child, we should agree to offer before anyone else. If I am discourteous, controlling and sarcastic to my teenager simply because I “have every right considering that I am the parent” or due to the fact that “my child started it,” what do you think that teaches my child?
It is much easier to give respect to somebody when they are respecting and appreciating you. As the mom or daddy, you can set the example and also show your teen that you value their viewpoint, and you respect them as a person. How Do I Discipline My 2 Year Old For Daycare
This doesn’t imply you need to be a pushover. It does mean you can be kind in the face of disputes. It will certainly accomplish a lot more than you expect to set the stage for problem solving together toward a resolution.
In a comparable way, children mature a million times more from what we do than from what we say. So, if we want our teen to treat us with even more regard, the primary step is to see to it that you, as the parent, are doing just that to everybody in your life. How Do I Discipline My 2 Year Old For Daycare
Are you gentle to your spouse, to your siblings, to all your children, as well as to the customer service representative on the phone? In every one of those circumstances, you have a VIP audience of one (your child!) that you should be considering. Remember, the apple won’t fall far from the tree.
Is positive parenting really effective?
I could answer this one with a resounding “Yes!” Or I can share a personal recollection …
Just a few days ago, my two girls were having a squabble. I asked my 3-year-old exactly how she really felt, and also she said she was angry due to the fact that my 6-year-old took a sticker label she was playing with.
My 6-year-old heard this, escaped to the other room to collect her thoughts, after that returned and also returned the swiped sticker, said sorry and also asked for forgiveness.
They made up, embraced and also begun playing once more gladly. Yes, this ACTUALLY HAPPENED. No, I did not force or intimidate any person to resolve the conflict. And also yet we experienced a lovely resolution. You recognize why? How Do I Discipline My 2 Year Old For Daycare
Because we have actually modeled for our children how to problem solve, just how to fix disputes, as well as even how to apologize. That’s right – we say sorry to our kids when we screw up. (Gasp! Say sorry to children, oh the horror.) That investment is returned a thousand-fold when you realize your children will unavoidably repeat your actions.
The bottom line is … When we can humble ourselves, deal with everybody around us with respect, as well as model the actions we desire, you would certainly be astonished at what’s feasible.
Some visitors may be wondering about my husband, Antonio, as well as his 2 teen sons from a previous relationship. Over time, Antonio has actually begun parenting positively as well, and also the repair of their relationship is nothing except miraculous.
How can you come to be a positive parent? How Do I Discipline My 2 Year Old For Daycare
This is the million-dollar question! Discovering positive parenting is one of the most rewarding things I’ve ever before done. I won’t stretch the truth to you – it can be difficult to transform your old ways. However bit by bit, you will make improvements. And a year or more from now, you won’t think just how much you’ve altered, in addition to the closer partnership you have with your kids.
I advise any person who is serious about coming to be a more positive mom or daddy to have a look at Amy McCready’s Positive Parenting Solutions FREE parenting webinar. How Do I Discipline My 2 Year Old For Daycare
You’ve most likely seen Amy on ABC, CBS, CNN, FOX, MSNBC, Today Show, Rachel Ray or any kind of number of media channels. Her materials have actually been life-changing for more than 75,000 moms and dads across the globe, and there’s no much better parenting guidance you can truly apply every day.
In her totally free webinar, Amy shares just how to get kids of every age to behave WITHOUT nagging or shouting. She’ll assist you in starting parenting positive, as well as learn how to stop the power struggle before it begins! You can sign up for the totally free class by clicking the button below. How Do I Discipline My 2 Year Old For Daycare
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