How To Get Baby To Sleep In Own Bed – Just How I Used Positive Parenting to At Long Last Get My Kids to Cooperate

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How To Get Baby To Sleep In Own Bed
HAZEL DEAN
Wife to Antonio, and mommy of two girls

When I initially came to be a mommy, I understood that I wanted to do things in a different way than how I was raised. My mom and dad did the best job they could, however they really did not have access to the variety of positive parenting tools readily available today. How To Get Baby To Sleep In Own Bed

There were a few books on our bookshelf regarding dealing with power struggles, how to deal with the strong-willed child, as well as just how to get your kids to do what you say. I recall seeing these books around the house, and I noticeably remember thinking at the time, “My own mom and dad do not understand me.”

I’m not sure what exactly they found out in those books, but I grew up with a lot of spanking, a great deal of shouting, as well as a lot of just plain blowing up.

It was a hard number of years. And our connection is still not the best today, although I have sincerely forgiven them for what happened. I’ve come to realize that, while no one is without fault, it is our responsibility to be the best parent we can possibly be for our children. I knew I intended to stop the cycle when I came to be a mother.How To Get Baby To Sleep In Own Bed

From toddlers to teenagers, positive parenting is my answer How To Get Baby To Sleep In Own Bed

My very own experience with positive parenting began when my first little girl was born. I began reviewing articles regarding just how a child’s secure attachment to a parent is harmed through spanking, shouting, harsh punishments and virtually every other traditionally approved parenting method.

I started to think, “Well, if you can’t do those things, how in the world do you get obtain your kids to listen to you?” Little did I know there’s an entire toolbox of positive parenting tips that enable everyone to have their needs met. I learned more about:

• Problem-solving

• Resolving power struggles

• Strong communication skills

• Natural consequences

• Just how every one of these concepts lead to healthy and balanced child development How To Get Baby To Sleep In Own Bed

How To Get Baby To Sleep In Own Bed

During my learning experience, my husband Antonio joined my journey. He brought a different viewpoint. He had two teen boys from a previous relationship, and also had observed firsthand how being the “mean father” might seem to work for the moment. Long-term, it was only promoting disrespect, anger and bitterness in what was meant to be a loving parent-child partnership.

Considering his background as well as finding out exactly what NOT to do, Antonio was just as open as I was to studying as well as following through with positive parenting in our lives.

So what does positive parenting mean anyway? How To Get Baby To Sleep In Own Bed

First, let me tell you what it doesn’t indicate. Positive parenting is NOT:

• Letting your kids run wild

• Being a passive parent

• Disregarding significant wrongdoing

• Providing your children every little thing they want How To Get Baby To Sleep In Own Bed

• Being a servant on-call 24/7

• Sheltering your kids from what will be expected of them in “real life”

• Having no restrictions

You might see positive parenting called by various other names like peaceful parenting, gentle parenting, respectful parenting or connection parenting. Regardless of what you call it, this parenting method identifies the fact that cooperation always generates better lasting results than strict control.

Moms and dads that adopt this concept have learned to cultivate:

• Common respect

• Empathy (both in themselves as well as in their children)

• Establishing healthy boundaries

• Developing a child’s fundamental character traits

Helping children to do what’s right since they WANT to, not due to the fact that they are afraid of retribution if they don’t … Besides, what happens as soon as they’re adults and also the threat of punishment is over?

• Acknowledgment that both children and also parents need to be listened to and also valued

• Encouraging kids to establish self-discipline

• Going much deeper than simple external compliance and concentrating on the child’s heart

The funny thing is, when you actually dig in to the heart issues, all the surface-level “obedience” stuff takes care of itself.

What are some positive parenting techniques? And how do you correct a child’s bad behavior with positive parenting?

When I initially started down the path of gentle parenting, I couldn’t imagine that there were various other methods to “get a child to behave” besides harsh punishments and shouting. That’s exactly how I was parented, and therefore I obviously had no understanding about anything different. How To Get Baby To Sleep In Own Bed

I’ll share some parenting strategies I picked up from Amy McCready, a well-respected parenting expert and also creator of Positive Parenting Solutions. Amy has actually worked as parenting guide to countless moms and dads, helping them get rid of the power struggle of reactionary parenting via her 7-Step Parenting Success System online program.

Right here are a number of the techniques Amy reveals to help you to come to be the mother or daddy you’ve always wanted to be, and help your child to reach his or her complete potential.

Discover the root of the behavior

I told you this is deep. It’s usually simpler (as well as extra common in today’s society) to think children are just spoiled brats, which is why they act out.

Yet we can get a lot further towards resolving power struggles when we see children as little humans. They real needs much like you and me. And also frequently their legitimate needs are magnified based on where they’re currently at on the brain as well as language development growth spectrum. How To Get Baby To Sleep In Own Bed

For example, a 2-year-old’s pre-frontal cortex (the part of the brain that makes it possible for self-discipline) is not yet developed. That means they can go from happy one minute to major tantrum the next. So rather than dealing with a losing battle by ordering a 2-year-old to time-out for hitting you on the arm, you can recognize that:

• Young children have little self-discipline to begin with

• Anger is a secondary emotion – that indicates there is typically a main emotion below it

• Many mad children are in fact frightened and/or sad

What’s a peaceful parent to do?

• Determine if there are any kind of basic needs that should be met first. As an example, if a child is hungry or worn out, there’s no measure of peaceful OR punitive parenting that is going to remedy the problem. Focus on addressing that large need initially.

• Empathize with his feelings without approving of the misbehavior (“I can see that you’re sincerely upset because I said we couldn’t play at the park today. I recognize it’s hard because you genuinely want to play on the swings. Hitting hurts, and I will not let you do it”) … After that, move away to protect yourself if necessary.

• Concentrating too much on what you DON’T desire the child to do only makes the situation even worse. So redirect the behavior toward something he CAN do to let off steam when he’s mad – like surround himself in a huge hug and also say firmly “I’m mad!” Or tighten his hands into clenched fists and growl. The goal is to allow him to express his anger in an age-appropriate way, while not hurting any person or anything.

Remember the Golden Rule

I informed you previously that positive parenting benefits every age – from toddlers to ‘tweens, teens and also everyone in between. So let’s think about young adults in our following scenario … How To Get Baby To Sleep In Own Bed

Respectful parenting goes both ways. That implies what we wish to receive from our child, we have to be willing to provide first. If I am disrespectful, manipulative as well as sarcastic to my teenager simply due to the fact that I “have every right since I am the parent” or because “my child started it,” what do you think that communicates to my child?

It is much easier to offer respect to someone when they are respecting and appreciating you. As the mom or father, you can set the example and also communicate to your young adult that you value their opinion, and also you respect them as a person. How To Get Baby To Sleep In Own Bed

This doesn’t suggest you have to be a pushover. But it does indicate you can be kind when faced with disputes. It will accomplish a lot more than you expect to set the stage for problem solving together towards a resolution.

In a similar way, children mature a million times more from what we do than from what we say. If we desire our teen to treat us with even more respect, the initial step is to make sure you, as the parent, are doing simply that to everyone in your life. How To Get Baby To Sleep In Own Bed

Are you kind to your spouse, to your siblings, to all your children, as well as to the customer support rep on the phone? In each of those situations, you have a VIP audience of one (your child!) that you need to be thinking of. Keep in mind, the apple will not fall far from the tree.

Is positive parenting really effective?

I can address this one with a definite “Yes!” Or I can share an individual recollection …

Just the other day, my two girls were having a squabble. I asked my 3-year-old how she really felt, and she said she was angry due to the fact that my 6-year-old took a sticker she was having fun with.

My 6-year-old heard this, went into the other room to collect her thoughts, then came back as well as returned the stolen sticker, apologized as well as asked for forgiveness.

They made up, embraced as well as started playing again gladly. Yes, this ACTUALLY HAPPENED. No, I did not control or manipulate anyone to fix the conflict. As well as yet we experienced a beautiful resolution. You recognize why? How To Get Baby To Sleep In Own Bed

Due to the fact that we have actually modeled for our children just how to problem solve, just how to deal with disputes, and also even just how to ask forgiveness. That’s right – we say sorry to our kids when we mess up. (Gasp! Ask forgiveness to children, oh the horror.) That investment is returned a thousand-fold when you recognize your children will undoubtedly repeat your actions.

The bottom line is … When we can swallow our pride, deal with everyone around us with respect, and model the habits we desire, you would certainly be astonished at what’s feasible.

Some visitors may be wondering about my husband, Antonio, as well as his 2 adolescent boys from a previous relationship. In time, Antonio has actually started parenting positively too, and the restoration of their connection is nothing short of a miracle.

Just how can you become a positive parent? How To Get Baby To Sleep In Own Bed

This is the million-dollar question! Understanding positive parenting is one of the most rewarding things I have actually ever done. I won’t stretch the truth to you – it can be hard to transform your old parenting style. Yet bit by bit, you will certainly make improvements. As well as a year or 2 from now, you will not think just how much you have actually transformed, along with the closer connection you have with your kids.

I suggest any person who is serious about becoming a more positive mother or daddy to take a look at Amy McCready’s Positive Parenting Solutions FREE parenting class. How To Get Baby To Sleep In Own Bed

You have actually probably seen Amy on ABC, CBS, CNN, FOX, MSNBC, Today Show, Rachel Ray or any number of media channels. Her materials have actually been life-altering for greater than 75,000 moms and dads around the world, and also there’s no much better parenting guidance you can really apply every day.

In her totally free webinar, Amy shares just how to help kids of any age to behave WITHOUT manipulating or shouting. She’ll help you in beginning parenting positive, and also learn how to stop the power struggle before it starts! You can sign up for the totally free class by clicking the button below. How To Get Baby To Sleep In Own Bed


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