Parenting Course Online – Just How I Applied Positive Parenting to Ultimately Get My Kids to Cooperate

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Parenting Course Online
HAZEL DEAN
Wife to Antonio, and mommy of two girls

When I initially came to be a mother, I recognized that I wanted to do things in different ways than how I was raised. My mom and dad did the best job they could, but they didn’t have access to the wide variety of positive parenting tools offered today. Parenting Course Online

There were a few books on our shelf regarding handling power struggles, just how to discipline the stubborn child, and also just how to get your kids to obey. I remember seeing these books around our home, and I distinctly recall thinking at the time, “My own parents don’t understand me.”

I’m uncertain exactly what they discovered in those books, however I experienced a great deal of spanking, a lot of screaming, and a great deal of just plain blowing up.

It was a difficult number of years. And our connection is still strained today, although I’ve sincerely forgiven them for what happened. I have actually begun to understand that, while nobody is without fault, it is our obligation to be the best parent we can possibly be for our children. I recognized I wished to stop the cycle when I came to be a mama.Parenting Course Online

From toddlers to teenagers, positive parenting is my solution Parenting Course Online

My very own experience with positive parenting began when my oldest little girl was born. I started reviewing blogs concerning how a child’s secure attachment to a parent is harmed through spanking, shouting, harsh punishments and also virtually every other typically approved parenting technique.

I started to assume, “Well, if you can’t do those things, how in the world do you get obtain your kids to pay attention to you?” Little did I understand there’s a whole toolbox of positive parenting tips that allow everyone to have their needs met. I learned about:

• Problem-solving

• Handling power struggles

• Strong communication skills

• Natural consequences

• Just how all of these principles bring about healthy and balanced child development Parenting Course Online

Parenting Course Online

In the process, my hubby Antonio joined my journey. Yet he brought a different perspective. He had two teen boys from a previous marriage, and also had actually seen firsthand how being the “mean father” could seem to benefit for the moment. In the long run, it was only promoting disrespect, anger and also bitterness in what was intended to be a loving parent-child connection.

Considering his background and discovering precisely what NOT to do, Antonio was equally as open as I was to researching and applying positive parenting in our lives.

What does positive parenting mean anyhow? Parenting Course Online

First, let me inform you what it doesn’t suggest. Positive parenting is NOT:

• Allowing your kids to do whatever they want

• Being a passive parent

• Overlooking major misbehavior

• Providing your children whatever they want Parenting Course Online

• Being a servant on-call 24/7

• Safeguarding your kids from what will certainly be expected of them in “real life”

• Having no boundaries

You might see positive parenting called by other names like peaceful parenting, gentle parenting, respectful parenting or connection parenting. Regardless of what you call it, this parenting approach recognizes the fact that cooperation always yields far better lasting outcomes than harsh control.

Moms and dads that embrace this design have actually figured out how to promote:

• Common respect

• Empathy (both in themselves and in their children)

• Establishing healthy limits

• Building a child’s foundational character qualities

Encouraging children to do what’s right due to the fact that they WANT to, not since they are afraid of punishment if they do not … Nevertheless, what happens once they’re adults and the threat of punishment is eliminated?

• Acknowledgment that both children and parents need to be heard and valued

• Assisting kids to grow their self-discipline

• Going much deeper than simple outward conformity and also concentrating on the child’s heart

The funny thing is, when you truly dig in to the heart issues, all the surface-level “obedience” stuff resolves itself.

What are some positive parenting techniques? And how do you correct a child’s bad behavior with positive parenting?

When I first started down the path of gentle parenting, I could not picture that there were various other ways to “get a child to behave” besides punishing as well as yelling. That’s just how I was treated as a child, and I simply had no framework for anything different. Parenting Course Online

I’ll share some parenting strategies I gained from Amy McCready, a well-known parenting expert as well as creator of Positive Parenting Solutions. Amy has actually functioned as parenting guide to countless moms and dads, helping them eliminate the power struggle of reactionary parenting with her 7-Step Parenting Success System on-line program.

Below are a couple of the techniques Amy shares to encourage you to evolve into the mother or father you’ve always intended to be, as well as encourage your child to reach his or her highest potential.

Find the root of the misbehavior

I mentioned this is deep stuff. It’s usually simpler (and much more usual in today’s world) to presume children are just spoiled brats, and that is why they act out.

However we can progress a whole lot further toward addressing power struggles when we see children as little people. They real needs much like you and me. As well as most times their legitimate needs are multiplied based on where they’re currently at on the brain and language development spectrum. Parenting Course Online

For instance, a toddler’s pre-frontal cortex (the part of the brain that allows self-control) is not yet matured. That indicates they can go from cloud nine one moment to complete meltdown the next. So instead of fighting a losing battle by ordering a 2-year-old to time-out for hitting you on the arm, you can recognize that:

• Toddlers have little self-control to begin with

• Anger is a secondary feeling – that indicates there is always a key feeling beneath it

• The majority of upset children are actually anxious and/or very sad

What’s a peaceful parent to do?

• Determine if there are any kind of fundamental needs that have to be addressed initially. For instance, if a child is starving or tired, there’s no measure of peaceful OR punitive parenting that is likely to assist. Concentrate on meeting that big need first.

• Validate his emotions without approving of the behavior (“I can see that you’re really angry since I said we could not go to the park today. I know it’s tough due to the fact that you really want to play on the swings. But, hitting hurts, so I won’t let you do it”) … After that, move away to protect yourself if required.

• Concentrating more on what you DON’T desire the child to do only makes the situation even worse. So redirect the behavior toward something he is OK to do to let off steam when he’s mad – like squeeze himself in a big hug and say “I’m mad!” Or ball his hands right into clenched fists and growl. The objective is to allow him to share his disappointment in an age-appropriate way, while not hurting anyone or anything.

Keep In Mind the Golden Rule

I informed you earlier that positive parenting benefits any age – from young children to ‘tweens, teens as well as everything in between. So let’s think about teens in our next scenario … Parenting Course Online

Respectful parenting goes both ways. That suggests what we desire to receive from our child, we have to be ready to give. If I am discourteous, controlling as well as sarcastic to my teenager just because I “have every right given that I am the parent” or since “my child started it,” what do you believe that teaches my child?

It is a lot easier to provide respect to someone when they are respecting and appreciating you. As the mama or dad, you can set the standard and also communicate to your young adult that you value their opinion, as well as you respect them as an individual. Parenting Course Online

This does not indicate you have to be a pushover. But it does imply you can be kind despite problems. It will certainly accomplish more than you anticipate to establish the stage for problem solving together towards a resolution.

In a comparable way, children grow a million times more from what we do than from what we claim to believe. So, if we want our teen to treat us with more respect, the primary step is to make certain that you, as the parent, are doing simply that to everybody in your life. Parenting Course Online

Are you kind to your spouse, to your brother or sisters, to all your children, and to the customer care rep on the phone? In each of those scenarios, you have a VIP audience of one (your child!) that you must be thinking of. Remember, the apple won’t fall far from the tree.

Is positive parenting really effective?

I could address this with an unquestionable “Yes!” Or I can share a personal story …

Just the other day, my 2 girls were having a squabble. I asked my 3-year-old just how she really felt, and she stated she was angry because my 6-year-old took a sticker she was playing with.

My 6-year-old heard this, escaped to the other room to collect her thoughts, then returned and returned the swiped sticker, apologized and asked for forgiveness.

They made up, hugged as well as begun playing once more happily. Yes, this ACTUALLY HAPPENED. No, I did not force or manipulate any individual to deal with the problem. And yet we experienced a peaceful resolution. You know why? Parenting Course Online

Because we have modeled for our children how to problem solve, how to settle conflict, and even how to ask forgiveness. That’s right – we ask forgiveness to our kids when we mess up. (Gasp! Apologize to children, oh the horror.) That investment is returned a thousand-fold when you realize your children will unavoidably repeat your actions.

The bottom line is … When we can humble ourselves, deal with everyone around us with respect, and model the behavior we desire, you would certainly be amazed at what’s possible.

Some readers could be wondering about my husband, Antonio, as well as his 2 teen boys from a previous marriage. With time, Antonio has actually started parenting positively too, and the restoration of their connection is nothing except a miracle.

How can you become a positive parent? Parenting Course Online

This is the million-dollar question! Discovering positive parenting is among the most fulfilling things I have actually ever before done. I will not stretch the truth to you – it can be challenging to alter your old parenting style. Yet little by little, you will certainly make improvements. And a year or two from now, you will not believe how much you have actually changed, along with the closer relationship you have with your kids.

I suggest any individual who is serious about growing to be a more positive mother or daddy to check out Amy McCready’s Positive Parenting Solutions FREE parenting class. Parenting Course Online

You have actually probably seen Amy on ABC, CBS, CNN, FOX, MSNBC, Today Show, Rachel Ray or any type of number of media networks. Her materials have been life-altering for more than 75,000 moms and dads across the globe, and there’s no much better parenting guidance you can really use every day.

In her free webinar, Amy shares how to get kids of all ages to listen WITHOUT nagging or shouting. She’ll help you in beginning parenting positive, and also find out how to quit the power struggle before it starts! You can sign up for the totally free class by clicking the button shown below. Parenting Course Online


Disclosure: This post contains affiliate links. If you go through them to make a purchase, I will earn a commission (at no additional cost to you), which compensates for my time spent to compile this information. The decision is yours, and whether or not you decide to buy something is completely up to you.

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