Parenting Tips For Preschoolers Behavior – Just How I Used Positive Parenting to Ultimately Get My Kids to Cooperate

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Parenting Tips For Preschoolers Behavior
HAZEL DEAN
Wife to Antonio, and mommy of two girls

When I first became a mom, I knew that I wanted to do things in a different way than how I was parented. My mother and father did the very best they could, yet they really did not have access to the variety of positive parenting tools offered today. Parenting Tips For Preschoolers Behavior

There were a couple of books on our bookshelf about dealing with power struggles, how to discipline the strong-willed child, as well as just how to get your kids to do what you say. I recall seeing these books around our home, and I noticeably remember thinking at the time, “My own mom and dad don’t understand me.”

I’m uncertain exactly what they learned in those books, yet I grew up with a great deal of spanking, a lot of yelling, and also a great deal of just plain tempers raging.

It was a challenging period of time. And also our connection is still not the best today, although I have sincerely forgiven them for their mistakes. I have actually begun to recognize that, while no one is perfect, it is our obligation to be the best parent we can possibly be for our children. I knew I wished to break the cycle when I became a mom.Parenting Tips For Preschoolers Behavior

From toddlers to teenagers, positive parenting is my solution Parenting Tips For Preschoolers Behavior

My very own experience with positive parenting began when my first child was born. I started reviewing blogs about how a child’s secure attachment to a parent is harmed through spanking, shouting, harsh punishments and also virtually every other typically approved parenting method.

I began to believe, “Well, if you can not do those things, how in the world do you get obtain your kids to do what you ask?” Little did I know there’s a whole tool kit of positive parenting tips that enable everybody to get their needs met. I found out about:

• Problem-solving

• Managing power struggles

• Solid communication skills

• Natural consequences

• Just how every one of these ideas lead to healthy child development Parenting Tips For Preschoolers Behavior

Parenting Tips For Preschoolers Behavior

During my learning experience, my husband Antonio joined my journey. He brought a different perspective. He had 2 teen boys from a previous marriage, and had actually observed firsthand exactly how being the “mean father” might appear to work temporarily. Yet in the long run, it was only fostering disrespect, contempt and also resentment in what was meant to be a caring parent-child partnership.

Considering his background and also discovering exactly what NOT to do, Antonio was just as open as I was to studying as well as implementing positive parenting in our lives.

So what does positive parenting really mean anyway? Parenting Tips For Preschoolers Behavior

Let me tell you what it doesn’t mean. Positive parenting is NOT:

• Letting your kids do whatever they want

• Being a lazy parent

• Overlooking major wrongdoing

• Providing your children everything they want Parenting Tips For Preschoolers Behavior

• Being a servant on-call 24/7

• Sheltering your kids from what will certainly be required of them in “the real world”

• Having no boundaries

You may hear positive parenting called by various other names like peaceful parenting, gentle parenting, respectful parenting or connection parenting. Regardless of what you call it, this parenting technique recognizes the fact that cooperation always generates much better lasting outcomes than forced control.

Parents that adopt this design have figured out how to promote:

• Shared respect

• Empathy (both in themselves and also in their children)

• Establishing healthy and balanced boundaries

• Building a child’s foundational character traits

Assisting children to do what’s right since they WANT to, not due to the fact that they fear retribution if they do not … Nevertheless, what happens when they’re grownups and also the threat of punishment is removed?

• Recommendation that both children and also parents need to be listened to and also valued

• Assisting kids to develop self-discipline

• Going deeper than simple exterior conformity as well as focusing on the child’s heart

The amusing thing is, when you truly dig in to the heart issues, all the surface-level “obedience” stuff resolves itself.

What are some positive parenting techniques? And how do you correct a child’s bad behavior with positive parenting?

When I first began down the road of gentle parenting, I could not envision that there were other techniques to “get a child to behave” besides punishing and shouting. That’s exactly how I was treated as a child, and I obviously had no framework for anything different. Parenting Tips For Preschoolers Behavior

I’ll share some parenting strategies I learned from Amy McCready, a nationally recognized parenting expert as well as creator of Positive Parenting Solutions. Amy has worked as parenting guide to thousands of mothers and fathers, helping them remove the power struggle of reactionary parenting via her 7-Step Parenting Success System on-line training course.

Right here are a couple of the techniques Amy reveals to encourage you to come to be the mom or father you’ve always wanted to be, and also encourage your child to reach his/her full potential.

Get to the root of the behavior

I told you this is deep stuff. It’s commonly much easier (and also a lot more usual in today’s world) to assume children are simply spoiled brats, which is why they act out.

We can get a whole lot farther toward resolving power struggles when we see children as little humans. They have needs just like you and also me. And most times their legitimate needs are multiplied based on where they’re currently at on the brain and also language development spectrum. Parenting Tips For Preschoolers Behavior

A young child’s pre-frontal cortex (the component of the brain that allows self-discipline) is not yet formed. That implies they can go from joyful one minute to major meltdown the next. Instead of dealing with a losing battle by ordering a 2-year-old to time-out for hitting you on the arm, you can acknowledge that:

• Toddlers have little self-control to begin with

• Anger is a secondary emotion – that implies there is always a key emotion under it

• Most angry children are in fact anxious and/or very sad

So what’s a peaceful parent to do?

• Determine if there are any kind of basic needs that should be met initially. For instance, if a child is hungry or exhausted, there’s no amount of peaceful OR punitive parenting that is going to remedy the problem. Concentrate on addressing that large need initially.

• Acknowledge his feelings without approving of the misbehavior (“I can see that you’re sincerely upset due to the fact that I said we could not play at the park today. I know it’s difficult because you truly want to play on the swings. Hitting hurts, and I will not let you do it”) … Then, move away to safeguard yourself if needed.

• Concentrating way too much on what you DON’T desire the child to do just makes the situation worse. So redirect the behavior toward something he MAY DO to let off steam when he is furious – like squeeze himself in a large hug and say “I am angry!” Or tighten his hands right into clenched fists and also growl. The intent is to permit him to express his sadness in an age-appropriate way, while not hurting any individual or anything.

Bear In Mind the Golden Rule

I told you previously that positive parenting benefits all ages – from young children to ‘tweens, teenagers and also everyone in between. So let’s talk about young adults in our next example … Parenting Tips For Preschoolers Behavior

Respectful parenting goes both ways. That suggests what we want to receive from our child, we must want to offer first. If I am impolite, controlling as well as sarcastic to my teenager merely due to the fact that I “have every right given that I am the parent” or due to the fact that “my kid started it,” what do you assume that communicates to my child?

It is a lot easier to give respect to a person when they are respecting and valuing you. As the mom or father, you can set the standard and communicate to your young adult that you value their viewpoint, as well as you respect them as an individual. Parenting Tips For Preschoolers Behavior

This does not imply you need to be a pushover. Yet it does imply you can be kind despite problems. It will accomplish a lot more than you realize to establish the stage for problem solving with each other towards a resolution.

In a comparable way, children grow a million times more from what we do than from what we claim to believe. If we want our young adult to treat us with even more regard, the first step is to make sure you, as the parent, are doing simply that to everybody in your life. Parenting Tips For Preschoolers Behavior

Are you kind to your partner, to your siblings, to all your children, and to the customer support rep on the phone? In every one of those situations, you have a VIP audience of one (your child!) that you need to be thinking of. Keep in mind, the apple will not fall far from the tree.

Is positive parenting really effective?

I can address this with a resounding “Yes!” Or I could share a personal story …

Just recently, my two young girls were having a squabble. I asked my 3-year-old how she really felt, as well as she claimed she was angry because my 6-year-old took a sticker label she was having fun with.

My 6-year-old heard this, escaped to the other room to collect her thoughts, after that returned and also returned the swiped sticker, apologized and also asked for forgiveness.

They made up, hugged as well as begun playing once more happily. Yes, this ACTUALLY HAPPENED. No, I did not force or threaten any person to settle the problem. As well as yet we experienced a beautiful resolution. You know why? Parenting Tips For Preschoolers Behavior

Due to the fact that we have actually modeled for our children how to problem solve, how to settle conflict, and even just how to say sorry. That’s right – we say sorry to our kids when we mess up. (Gasp! Ask forgiveness to children, oh the horror.) That investment is returned a thousand-fold when you realize your children will unavoidably repeat your actions.

The bottom line is … When we can humble ourselves, deal with every person around us with respect, and also model the habits we desire, you would be astonished at what’s feasible.

Some readers might be curious about my spouse, Antonio, and his 2 adolescent boys from a previous relationship. Gradually, Antonio has started parenting positively also, and the restoration of their relationship is nothing except miraculous.

Just how can you evolve to be a positive parent? Parenting Tips For Preschoolers Behavior

This is the million-dollar question! Knowing positive parenting is among the most rewarding things I’ve ever done. I will not lie to you – it can be difficult to alter your old way of life. Little by little, you will certainly make improvements. And also a year or 2 from now, you will not think how much you’ve changed, in addition to the closer connection you have with your kids.

I recommend anybody who is serious about coming to be a much more positive mom or dad to have a look at Amy McCready’s Positive Parenting Solutions FREE parenting webinar. Parenting Tips For Preschoolers Behavior

You’ve most likely seen Amy on ABC, CBS, CNN, FOX, MSNBC, Today Show, Rachel Ray or any kind of number of media channels. Her materials have actually been life-altering for greater than 75,000 parents across the globe, as well as there’s no better parenting guidance you can truly apply every day.

In her free webinar, Amy shares exactly how to get kids of every age to behave WITHOUT nagging or yelling. She’ll aid you in beginning parenting positive, as well as discover how to stop the power struggle before it begins! You can sign up for the totally free class by clicking the button below. Parenting Tips For Preschoolers Behavior


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