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When I first became a mom, I recognized that I intended to do things in different ways than how I was raised. My mother and father did the very best they could, however they really did not have access to the myriad of positive parenting tools readily available today. Positive Parenting Solutions Reviews UK
There were a few books on our shelf concerning handling power struggles, how to deal with the strong-willed child, as well as how to get your kids to do what you say. I recall seeing these books around the house, and I definitely recall thinking at the time, “My own mom and dad don’t understand me.”
I’m not sure what exactly they found out in those books, but I experienced a lot of spanking, a great deal of shouting, and also a great deal of just plain losing control.
It was a difficult number of years. And our relationship is still strained today, although I’ve genuinely forgiven them for their misjudgements. I’ve begun to recognize that, while no one is perfect, it is our obligation to be the most effective parent we can possibly be for our children. I understood I wanted to stop the cycle when I became a mother.Positive Parenting Solutions Reviews UK
From toddlers to teens, positive parenting is my plan Positive Parenting Solutions Reviews UK
My own experience with positive parenting started when my oldest daughter was born. I began checking out blog posts concerning just how a child’s secure attachment to a parent is damaged with spanking, shouting, harsh punishments and also basically every other typically accepted parenting strategy.
I began to believe, “Well, if you can’t do those things, how in the world do you get obtain your kids to listen to you?” Little did I realize there’s a whole tool kit of positive parenting tips that enable everyone to get their needs fulfilled. I learned more about:
• Handling power struggles
• Strong communication skills
• Natural consequences
• How every one of these ideas cause healthy child development Positive Parenting Solutions Reviews UK
During my learning experience, my hubby Antonio joined my journey. He brought his own unique perspective. He had 2 teen boys from a previous relationship, and also had actually observed firsthand exactly how being the “mean dad” might seem to benefit temporarily. In the long run, it was just promoting disrespect, anger as well as bitterness in what was expected to be a loving parent-child relationship.
Given his background and finding out specifically what NOT to do, Antonio was just as open as I was to examining and also applying positive parenting in our lives.
What does positive parenting really mean anyhow? Positive Parenting Solutions Reviews UK
Let me inform you what it does not imply. Positive parenting is NOT:
• Letting your kids do whatever they want
• Being a lazy parent
• Overlooking significant misbehavior
• Offering your children whatever they ask for Positive Parenting Solutions Reviews UK
• Being a servant on-call 24/7
• Sheltering your kids from what will certainly be required of them in “real life”
• Having no limits
You may hear positive parenting called by various other names like peaceful parenting, gentle parenting, respectful parenting or connection parenting. No matter what you call it, this parenting approach acknowledges the truth that collaboration always produces better long-lasting results than harsh control.
Parents that embrace this concept have figured out how to promote:
• Shared respect
• Empathy (both in themselves as well as in their children)
• Establishing healthy boundaries
• Building a child’s foundational character traits
• Helping children to do what’s right because they WANT to, not due to the fact that they are afraid of retribution if they do not … Nevertheless, what takes place as soon as they’re grownups and the threat of punishment is over?
• Recommendation that both children as well as parents need to be listened to as well as valued
• Helping kids to develop self-discipline
• Going much deeper than plain outward conformity and also concentrating on the child’s heart
The amusing thing is, when you really dig in to the heart issues, all the surface-level “obedience” stuff resolves itself.
What are some positive parenting techniques? And how do you correct a child’s bad behavior with positive parenting?
When I first started down the path of gentle parenting, I could not imagine that there were other techniques to “get a child to behave” besides harsh punishments and shouting. That’s how I was treated as a child, and I just had no understanding about anything different. Positive Parenting Solutions Reviews UK
I’ll share some parenting strategies I learned from Amy McCready, a nationally recognized parenting expert and owner of Positive Parenting Solutions. Amy has actually worked as parenting guide to thousands of mothers and fathers, helping them get rid of the power struggle of reactionary parenting with her 7-Step Parenting Success System on-line course.
Find the root of the misbehavior
I told you this is deep. It’s frequently much easier (and a lot more common in today’s world) to assume children are just spoiled brats, and that is why they act out.
Yet we can progress a great deal farther toward addressing power struggles when we see children as little human beings. They real needs much like you and also me. As well as many times their legitimate needs are magnified based on where they’re at on the brain and also language development growth spectrum. Positive Parenting Solutions Reviews UK
A young child’s pre-frontal cortex (the component of the brain that allows self-discipline) is not yet developed. That implies they can go from delighted one moment to major meltdown the next. Rather than battling a losing battle by sending a 2-year-old to time-out for hitting you on the arm, you can recognize that:
• Toddlers have little self-restraint to begin with
• Anger is a secondary emotion – that indicates there is always a main feeling beneath it
• Most angry children are actually frightened and/or very sad
What’s a peaceful parent to do?
• Determine if there are any kind of basic needs that have to be addressed first. As an example, if a child is starving or worn out, there’s no measure of peaceful OR punitive parenting that is likely to remedy the problem. Focus on addressing that big need first.
• Empathize with his feelings without approving of the behavior (“I can see that you’re sincerely angry since I said we couldn’t play at the park today. I recognize it’s tough due to the fact that you truly want to play on the swings. Hitting hurts, and also I won’t allow you to do it”) … After that, move away to safeguard yourself if needed.
• Focusing way too much on what you DON’T want the child to do just makes the situation even worse. So redirect the behavior toward something he CAN do to let off steam when he is furious – like squeeze himself in a huge hug and say firmly “I am angry!” Or ball his hands into fists and also growl. The intent is to permit him to express his sadness in an age-appropriate way, while not hurting any individual or anything.
Keep In Mind the Golden Rule
I told you previously that positive parenting works for all ages – from young children to ‘tweens, teenagers and everything in between. So let’s think about teens in our following scenario … Positive Parenting Solutions Reviews UK
Respectful parenting goes both ways. That means what we want to receive from our child, we must be ready to offer. If I am impolite, manipulative and sarcastic to my teenager simply due to the fact that I “have every right since I am the parent” or since “my child started it,” what do you believe that reveals to my child?
It is much easier to offer respect to somebody when they are respecting and appreciating you. As the mother or daddy, you can set the example as well as show your young adult that you value their viewpoint, and you value them as a person. Positive Parenting Solutions Reviews UK
This doesn’t mean you have to be a pushover. But it does imply you can be kind when faced with disputes. It will accomplish more than you anticipate to set the stage for problem solving with each other towards a resolution.
In a comparable way, children mature a million times more from what we do than from what we claim to believe. So, if we want our young adult to treat us with more regard, the very first step is to ensure that you, as the parent, are doing just that to every person in your life. Positive Parenting Solutions Reviews UK
Are you kind to your partner, to your brother or sisters, to all your children, and to the customer care representative on the phone? In each of those situations, you have a VIP audience of one (your child!) that you have to be considering. Remember, the apple will not fall far from the tree.
Is positive parenting really effective?
I could answer this with a definite “Yes!” Or I could share an individual recollection …
Just a few days ago, my two girls were having a spat. I asked my 3-year-old just how she really felt, as well as she claimed she was angry due to the fact that my 6-year-old took a sticker label she was playing with.
My 6-year-old heard this, escaped to the other room to gather her thoughts, then came back and returned the stolen sticker label, said sorry as well as asked for forgiveness.
They made up, hugged and started playing once more gladly. Yes, this ACTUALLY HAPPENED. No, I did not force or threaten anybody to settle the conflict. And also yet we experienced a beautiful resolution. You recognize why? Positive Parenting Solutions Reviews UK
Because we have modeled for our children how to problem solve, exactly how to resolve conflict, as well as even just how to ask forgiveness. That’s right – we say sorry to our kids when we mess up. (Gasp! Ask forgiveness to children, oh the horror.) That investment is returned a thousand-fold when you realize your children will inevitably repeat your actions.
The bottom line is … When we can humble ourselves, deal with every person around us with respect, and model the habits we want, you would certainly be astonished at what’s feasible.
Some readers may be curious about my partner, Antonio, and his 2 teenage boys from a previous marriage. In time, Antonio has begun parenting positively also, and also the restoration of their connection is nothing short of miraculous.
Exactly how can you become a positive parent? Positive Parenting Solutions Reviews UK
This is the million-dollar question! Learning positive parenting is among the most satisfying things I have actually ever before done. I won’t stretch the truth to you – it can be difficult to transform your old parenting style. However gradually, you will certainly make improvements. And also a year or two from now, you will not think how much you’ve changed, along with the closer connection you have with your kids.
I suggest anybody who is serious about growing to be a more positive mother or dad to look into Amy McCready’s Positive Parenting Solutions FREE parenting webinar. Positive Parenting Solutions Reviews UK
You have actually most likely seen Amy on ABC, CBS, CNN, FOX, MSNBC, Today Show, Rachel Ray or any kind of variety of media networks. Her products have actually been life-changing for more than 75,000 parents around the world, and also there’s no better parenting guidance you can really use every day.
In her cost-free class, Amy shares just how to get kids of all ages to listen WITHOUT nagging or shouting. She’ll aid you in starting parenting positive, and also find out how to stop the power struggle before it starts! You can register for the cost-free class by clicking the button below. Positive Parenting Solutions Reviews UK
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